Kicking Up My Heels

Before this year comes to a close, I want to express my gratitude to a list of people: my family, both chosen and biological; those who healed my broken heart, even though they weren’t the ones who caused it; those who patiently listened as I revisited the same situation until I found healing; those who encouraged me; those who stood by me when I needed them most; those who loved me from afar; those who prayed for me; those I grew closer to; those I needed to distance myself from; the people who inspired me to embark on my next chapter; my readers, who continue to motivate me to share my story because it affects your lives; the people who reminded me of my true self; and finally, myself; but above all, to God. Thank you, and thank you a hundred times. Without each of you, I could not become who I am becoming, because this journey of becoming never ends. 

In every way and everywhere, we accept this with all gratitude. Acts 24:3

In 2024, I faced a year of goodbyes, quiet growth, and lessons I didn’t choose. But here I am, breathing, standing, and moving forward, so I guess He’s not done with me yet. Soon, we will be surrounded by all the positivity and motivation our little hearts desire, filling our social media feeds and inboxes. Some of us will adopt healthier habits, practice self-care, strive to be better people, attend church more regularly, or turn any negativity we wish to change into something positive. Of course, these are all wonderful goals to pursue. This past year, however, I learned the true meaning of positive change in life and how that change comes to fruition. It may not always appear as a conscious decision, nor does it always feel good or positive. The terms “positive” and “negative” don’t exist in God’s word or in how He has designed our experiences. I discovered that what I perceive as negative, because it feels more painful than anything good could feel, is constantly being used for our greater good. I learned that the pain we sometimes endure in our own lives helps others feel less pain in theirs. I realized the blessings bestowed upon me are not because of my actions, but are part of His meticulous plan and should be embraced as such. I found that the “negatives” in our lives can often be the “positives.” 

Since God had provided something better for us, that apart from us, they should not be made perfect. Hebrews 11:40

I’m kicking my heels up as I step into 2025. This will be my year of connection, a year dedicated to becoming comfortable being uncomfortable. Let’s face it: lately, discomfort has been my constant companion. Familiarity isn’t always healthy, and feeling safe isn’t always beneficial. One can develop a toxic relationship with comfort, and breaking ties with the old version of yourself can be the key to unlocking doors that were previously closed. I see it now. I’ve lingered in this uncomfortable space for so long that I’ve finally uncovered the person I had buried deep beneath the noise around me over the years—the one whom God has been urging me to recognize. I’ve learned that when the right people are in your life, they can draw you closer to who you are meant to be, and distancing yourself from the wrong ones can be equally helpful. There is magic in stepping back without shame in starting over, and movement can still happen in stillness. It’s the stillness that prepares you to receive the blessings you deserve. I’m ready for the blessings that God has in store for me, arms wide open. 

And all these blessings shall come upon you and overtake you if you obey the voice of the Lord your God. Deuteronomy 28:2

I’m clearing the clutter to make room for the new in my space, mind, and soul. I’m embarking on a new chapter where I will take small steps and deep breaths, love, learn, trust, and have faith. I’m disconnecting from what was never good for me, setting boundaries, and standing up for myself. With God’s help, I am becoming exactly who I am meant to be. Won’t you join me? I pray that each of you will join me on your own journeys to becoming. And along the way, you will discover who you are meant to be. Whenever you are in need or struggling to make sense of your life, please know there is always a seat at my table. There, you will find an espresso martini, a few tears, maybe some sarcasm, and lots of Jesus. Together, with faith and prayer, we can figure it all out. Please reach out if the need arises. Until then, I look forward to seeing you next month and Have the most Happy New Year! Let’s do this 2025!

Much Love and Blessings,

Kim